Day In Wrightwood

Yesterday Duff and I drove to Wrightwood to see Wendy and spend the day. Wendy has courageously battled breast cancer for 10 years. She has now lost the war and will return to Heavenly Father any day now. A month ago they gave her up to 30 days and the 30 days were yesterday. She can tell that everyday a little more strength is gone from her.

We visited out on Auntie Tia's backyard deck for about an hour after we got there. It was a gorgeous mountain day. Her deck is a very peaceful place. She and Sheri caught us up and needed some time to vent. It is hard when the surviving spouse is not handling things well and takes it out on the family in the form of control of their common loved one.

Then Sheri's phone buzzed and she was surprised to see that Wendy had texted her. She told us that means it's a good day if she is strong enough physically and emotionally to text. She wanted to know when Sheri was coming over and she told her she was on her way with a surprise!

When we got there and went upstairs, Sheri went in first and gave her a hug and kiss, and then Wendy realized someone else was in the doorway. When it registered that it was me, you should have seen her face! I wish I could have captured it on film. Her expression was such a contradiction. Happiness, surprise, pain, joy. I went over and hugged her and we both cried.

My cousin Sheri, and Wendy. She is maybe 100 pounds. I doubt it. For pictures she wanted to have her wig on. The best way to describe the physical toll this wretched cancer has taken on her body is this: 1) She looks like a dead woman on a heap of bodies at Aushwitz. 2) The alien in the movie Cocoon. I had heard these descriptions from my parents and from Sheri and Auntie Tia, but it is a whole other thing to see it in person.

There is a little couch across from her chair and we sat there at first. We talked about all kinds of things. Many of them from all our memories when we were little kids and teenagers together. We were pretty close cousins, all of us. At one point Duff told her to come visit us when we were at the temple, and she cried. I got up and went over and sat on the floor by her and held her hand while she wiped her tears. We stayed that way for the next 2 hours.
She finally was too tired to visit anymore and you could see it on her. This meant it was time to say 'good-bye'. We held each other for a long time and cried quietly. Then we took each other's face in our hands and looked in each other's eyes for a good while telling each other how much we loved each other. It was hard to let go for both of us. But she needed to rest.
We got in the car and I just cried. Then I cried some more when we walked in and Auntie gave me a hug. She cried too. And we just stood there for a while together letting the tears come.

When we got back to Auntie Tia and Uncle Bob's we had a refreshing dinner of Taco Salad. Auntie Tia introduced us to Taco Salad, oh back in the late 60's early 70's. The first time I had it was at her house. Her recipe is still my favorite. I don't get to make her version very often, because my family doesn't like it with the french salad dressing mixed with bottled hot sauce. But it is the best!

And then Poorman's Cake for dessert.
Uncle Bob is in end stage dementia. He is sleeping longer and longer. She put him to bed at 10pm and he was still asleep at noon when we got there. I went in and tried to rouse him and he was having none of it. But when we got back from Wendy's house and walked in, she asked him, "Who is that?" pointing to Duff. He said, "Oh, that guy who fixed our floor." Then she pointed to me and said, "Who is that?" And he said, "Oh! That is Cindy," just as matter of factly as ever. I was so happy he recognized me right off the bat!

Sheri and Auntie Tia
My camera is on the blink. I think it's time for a new one. Any suggestions?

Duff and Sheri.

Sheri has been here from Oregon for a month helping her mom with her Dad and Wendy. She will be here until it's all over. Shelly wishes she could be here too, but has to work and stays in touch everyday and is grateful Sheri can be here for both of them. Jared, one of Russell's sons has been here this last month as well helping take care of Uncle Bob and doing the odd jobs around the house and yard.

Me and Sheri at the end of a great but emotional day.

We had a group hug at the car and blew kisses as we drove out. I was exhausted and cried down the mountain.

There is nothing like family.

Eternal family.